Baby Hugs, Baby Kisses... er Slobbers...

Forewarning:  This is going to be a semi-mushy post.  If you are against such things, I suggest you take yourself to the nearest corner with earbuds, headphones, or earplugs in hand.  Place said object in/over your ears.  Pull knees to chest.  Wrap arms around your legs.  Commence rocking.  One of the little blog fairies will come and inform you when it's safe.  ;)

Before my daughter was born my Mother decided she was going to come visit us and be here for her arrival.  Of course, my daughter is just as stubborn as I am and decided to wait until her Nana got here.  Only, she didn't just wait until her Nana showed up, she made the doctor's drag her into the world.  Like I said, she's stubborn.  ;)  

Anyway, after we'd brought her home and I was fairly exhausted one day, my Mother said something that brought quite a bit of light into our little world... at least for me.  I was feeding my daughter and she was busy looking up at me as her hand wandered up and her little fingers curled around my index finger.  I remember smiling at her, watching her eyes close, as she relaxed against my arm.  My Mom informed me that what my daughter was doing with her little fingers curling around my finger was called a 'baby hug'. 

The thought of those little "baby hugs" still sticks with me, even now that she's going to be 8 months old and she no longer does them.  Now the only type of baby hugs that I get are if she somehow mimics my hugs, which she does at times.  Trust when I say that I soak them up like they are going out of style.  I know that, someday, I'm going to be grabbing and pulling her to give me a semblance of a hug. 

However, what she does do now is this slobbery type of kiss.  A baby kiss.  She mimics what she believes to be a kiss, the kisses that she is showered with every day.  She hasn't quite grasped how to blow kisses just yet, or how to smack her lips on someone's cheek as we do hers.  Instead, she leaves her mouth wide open and attempts to swallow our whole cheek and it gives this slobbery effect... a baby kiss.  They're the sweetest type of kiss.  While I love chocolate and Hershey's kisses and coffee... I would take just one of her baby kisses over coffee and chocolate.  (Y'know, unless my husband owes me an apology!  So, don't tell him!  It's our little secret!)

These moments with my daughter are the sweetest moments in the world.  When she's busy attempting to crawl all over me and she stops to look up at me, smiling as if she's discovered some great secret and she plants one of her baby kisses on my chin.  Or, I get one of those special hugs with a baby kiss on my cheek... right when it's needed the most.  *sigh*  Maybe I'm crazy and it's all in my head.  Perhaps I'm really lucky and she knows just what she's doing when she's acting as my saving grace on a perfectly horrific day.  I'm hoping for the latter.  I have enough crazy in my world. 

In My World...

In this lovely world people are considerate, white chocolate mocha's are never ending (depending on my mood it could be a Vanilla Latte - and sometimes they're Iced - y'know, depending on the weather), chocolate is readily available - and free just like the coffee, and my child is always happy.  Because people are considerate they are not constantly shoving their opinions down my throat and telling me how much I suck as a parent or how wrong I am.

Go back to that last sentence. 

Because people are considerate they are not constantly shoving their opinions down my throat and telling me how much I suck as a parent or how wrong I am.

If only this were true.  It's not just on one thing, it's on a number of things.  Whether it's with someone I've just met that really doesn't understand the entirety of the situation, or a friend who thinks their way is better. 

I do not always believe, I know, I am right.  In all seriousness, there are times I am wrong.  I will argue until I am blue, or purple, in the face if I am passionate about the topic and I believe that I am right.  I will not back down until I've been proven that I am wrong.  Then, and only then, will I apologize for being oh, so very wrong.  

However, there is a point when people should stop arguing, debating, or discussing.  That point is when another person is attempting to tell someone else how to parent their child. 

Back to the topic at hand.  A while back I was involved in a debate about ear piercing on a debate board, which I won't mention as I no longer frequent there because it got stupid fast.  Who would've thought that it was such a heated topic?!  I was told that I am a cruel Mommy and that ear piercing is a barbaric ritual, just as circumcision is for both male and females.  My jaw literally fell open, females I agree with and for males I believe it's more about remaining clean.  

I merely wanted my daughter's ears pierced at a young age because I know how painful it is to have them pierced when you're older.  And, I know that they can close up when you're older, even if you have them pierced as a baby.  So, if she decides to let them close she can.  This woman, in response, compared me to mass murderers!!!  I kid you not, all because I wanted to put white gold studs in my daughter's ears.

I was 'told' how to parent my child, in no uncertain terms.  I was told that I was not a good mother, instead I didn't deserve to have a baby at all!  I sat here, in my computer chair, breathing fire.  I believe my eyes turned bright red and I was, breathing fire.  It's quite possible I had to purchase a new keyboard... the entire thing sort of escapes me at the moment.  I was that angry.  

*Disclaimer:  I have to add this in because I have nothing against granola/crunchy mom's.  In fact, kudos to you ALL because there is NO way I could do it.  But this woman... she had issues.  Big ones.*  (AND I have no way of knowing if she was a 100% crunchy/granola Mom.  I just know that she was going on and on about how I probably didn't do things the way she did like cloth diapering and breast feeding, so I was wrong, which made me an even worse mother... of course that only fed into the fire-breathing bitch that I was becoming...)

I told her to take her crunchy ass and wash her damn underwear because she'd gone SO crunchy that she'd obviously foregone doing laundry for fear of using the Earth's natural resources.  

*Sigh*

Yes, I was a bitch... and that was only the beginning.  There was no reasoning with her, I had tried in previous posts.  When it got to her telling me I didn't deserve my child... well, I sorta lost it.  Obviously. 

She ended with stating that my daughter would hate me later in her life for piercing her ears but she hoped, on every star in the sky, that my daughter would forgive me. 

I laughed as I read that as I'm laughing now.  Really?  That's what she'll hate me for?  Not the dates I'll ruin, not the parties I'm going to forbid her from going to, not the boyfriends I'll embarrass her in front of... but because I pierced her ears?  Wow.  Well, if she does hate me in her teenage years, I'm doing something right.  Go me!!  =) 

Hello My Name is ___ and I'm a Blog Stalker. =) Welcome to My World.

I'm a Blog Stalker .. sometimes a Facebook Stalker.  Many times both.  Ha!  In all seriousness there are some people out there that I am friends with that I find that interesting and I just can't help but check their blog constantly.  I also check their Facebook all the time for updates.  At least a few of them know who they are.  Sure, that makes me a weirdo... whatever.  If people didn't already know I was weird when they became friends with me, I'm pretty sure that was their downfall and not mine.  At least I'm going to think so because in my world everything is better... or at least it's about me most of the time.  Okay so not so much since having my daughter, or I'd be a shitty Mom, but in this world it is about me.  So there. =)

Now that I'm done sounding like an adolescent on her rag, back to the topic.  Those people that I stalk... and troll... I came across something super funny, and sort of creepy. 

There are Moms out there that have business cards.  Yeah, they look a little something like this...

Really, Moms have to have business cards now?  When the hell did this happen?  When I was a kid and my Mom met someone she liked, wanted to keep in touch with, etc. she would dig out a piece of paper or an old receipt and jot down her number.  I am in sheer disbelief that people actually do this.  Why?  Are SAHM's really that in need to have something to define themselves that we need to get business cards for play dates?  (I am a SAHM, so don't go getting your panties in a wad.)  That is the only logical explanation that I can come up with.  And that just sounds... sad.  Really, really sad.  I'll probably catch flack for that from someone out there anyway.  Oh well. 

For those out there that are doing this for organization purposes... I have OCD and really, I'm not this organized.  I'm not putting anyone with OCD down because mine sucks, it sucks big time.  So if that's your issue, I'm sorry. 

Anyhow, the point is that I sort of stalk another blog, Ill-Advised Parenting Tips from the Bloggess, she rocks.  She posted these business cards that she made that she has one sale.  I seriously need to buy some of these in case a Mom approaches me with the above business cards.  Here's the website, The Bloggess Mommy Cards.  The one I'll most likely get is

"I'm going to offend you eventually so let's just get this out of the way.  Fuckity Fuck Fuck." 

Hey, if I'm lucky that works for the blog too!! =)  Check out the Mommy Business cards... the ones that people buy in seriousness are very nice... I just don't see the point personally.  Then check out the smartass ones.  Those are hilarious!!!

The Bad Mom's Club

Once the Hubs and I found out about our demon spawn... errr, lovely bundle of joy the many comeptimoms, super moms, whatever you want to define the Mom's with the attitude of "My child is a God" blah blah blah, "My child is SO advanced," blah blah blah started seeping out of the woodwork.  Okay Lady, really, I don't care.  What I care about is my child and how happy they are.  I don't care about what percentile your child is in for weight as opposed to height.  So you're throwing this at me... why?  I will not ever understand these types of women.  For my friends, I am beyond happy when their children are doing well.  The same for my family.  For these types of women... sorry, I can't seem to gather the energy to really care about you.  Really, just stop.  If you want to compete, find someone else to do it with.  *Ahem*  Sorry, these women really just annoy me to no end.

That's when I started doing a little research, I can't even recall what I was typing into Google.  It's a wondrous thing, as friends have pointed out when their blogs are searched for or stumbled on.  I'll just stop there... Lol.  Anyway, I came across The Bad Mom's Club Philosophy, and I couldn't agree more.  Mischief. Mayhem. Binkies.

I'm not looking to define myself by any means, though I suppose by doing that, I did just that.  I'm a Bad Mom.  But, as stated in the philosophy, it's a "celebration of independence from the tyranny of 'Good'-with-a-capital-G."  I think I can live with that.

I love this website.  I urge every mother to check it out, especially a first time mother.  I'm not sure about every other first time mother, but with all of these competimoms seeping out of the woodwork at me it was a lot of pressure until I finally got to the point of "SCREW YOU!"  I got there, and it wasn't pretty.  I lost some friends over it.  I do not even pretend to know what I'm doing 100% of the time because that is pointless.

I'm sure that Mina will likely grow up and one day look at me and say, "Mom I just want you to know that you scarred me for life when you did this, this, and that."
And I'll say, "Ya know, you scarred me for life when I gave birth to you.  I had to have stitches." 
Of course, at that point she'll probably be screaming, "Eeeewwww, gross!!!"  Bahahahahaha!
My Mom made plenty of mistakes while I was growing up.  It's part of parenthood.  I'm going to make plenty of mistakes too, but those are my mistakes to make.  I'll ask for advice along the way, take some of it, and leave the rest.  Thankfully, I have some awesome friends to help me out along the way... and I've learned to leave the competimoms eating my dust... or kissing my ass.  Maybe both.  =)

Hello, Hola... Yeah, you get it.

This blog is aptly named, it's going to be about whatever I feel like writing about at that moment in time.  I've been meaning to start it up for ... oh, I dunno, a week now?  That sounds about right.  One slight issue with that, I'm the worlds greatest procrastinator.  Name something and I've likely found a way to procrastinate doing it.  My daughter was even born past her due date.  Because of that, I believe that procrastination is hereditary.  Laugh at me, it's okay.  The voices in my head do.  So her birth date was either her procrastination or mine... I haven't decided yet.  I'm even procrastinating on the decision!  This is supposed to help me cure a bit of procrastination though.  If I have something that I have to come back to once a day, or at least every other day, and write something then I will... or should.  No, really, I will.  

Okay, enough of that.  This blog will range in topics from my life as a stay at home mom, to school, to politics, my life as a military wife, and likely things that make no sense at all.  Seriously, who makes sense on a caffeine high when they're awake at 3 a.m. and haven't had sleep in ... I don't know how long?  I don't even know if that paragraph about procrastination makes sense and I really don't feel like re-reading it.  

Coffee is my life line.  Actually, caffeine is my life-line... usually in any form.  Chocolate is my best friend, so if anyone out there had the misconception that you were my best friend then sorry you were mistaken.  I truly am.  Dearest husband, I am sorry to say this (kind of) but if I could have, I would have married the owner of a chocolate factory.  The only reason I did not is because of my hips... and my ass.  I really don't need either spreading out any more than they already are.  In fact, I need to get them under control as it is.  *sigh*  

Maybe I should write about my caffeine addiction... nah, it's not a problem unless I think it's a problem.  Hence, no problem.  All is right in the world.  =)